Friday, June 11, 2010
Cheap Beer No. 2: Lost Lake Pilsner
Crack it open and pour it out. Looks kind of pretty, at first. But that loose, soapy head will sink as quickly as your spirits after you’ve sniffed what’s in the cup. Dump a bottle of Sprite® into a bowl of Fritos® and I think you’d be close to the aroma of this. If you had any sense you’d stop there. Then again, if you had any sense you wouldn’t have bought this stuff in the first place. Ever suck on a nickel? I must have at some point because I know just what nickels taste like and the dominant flavor of this “Pilsner” is close to what you’d get licking Thomas Jefferson’s face. There’s a note of creamed-corn lurking in there, too, but that's quickly beat down by all that nickel. The beer finishes like a dull, arthritic ache and lingers on the palate long after you’ve lost the will to pour anymore of it into your mouth. Pair this with cadmium to produce a stool that can power a flashlight.
Final verdict: Would I buy this again? I don’t even want to look at it again.