Monday, September 21, 2015

Super-Selectable, Ever Delectable

Imagine for a moment that the year is 1953. You're tooling around Oshkosh in a Hudson Hornet. You see all these weird looking guys walking around with shaggy beards. Oshkosh is celebrating its centennial and to mark the event a lot of men in town are letting their face hair grow long. What a strange place this is, you think to yourself.

You snap on the radio. You tune in to WOSH and immediately get smacked in the ears with this fantastic piece of drivel (sung to the tune of the nursery rhyme Ten Little Indians).

One little, two little
Oshkosh Injuns
Three liitle, four little
Mi Gosh Injuns
Five little, Six little
B' Gosh Injuns
Big Chief Oshkosh's crew.

First little Injun
Famed for flavor
Next little Injun
Super Savor
Third little Injun
Mellow Goldness
Fourth little Injun
Sparkling Coldness
Five more, many more
Treats for you
In every glass of
Super-Selectable
Ever Delectable
Good Chief Oshkosh Brew

The jingle was written and produced for radio in January 1953 by the Chicago advertising firm C. Wendel Muench & Company. Just think, the Oshkosh Brewing Company had to go all the way to Illinois to find this crap. Sure, it's idiotic and offensive, but I still like the irony of it. The idea of promoting the flavor of something with a ditty that exhibits such poor taste, appeals to me in a bent sort of way. Now if I could only get it out of my head. One little, two little...

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